Permission granted: stop fixing what's not broken.

Default

Here's what that incredible woman didn’t know: the data on this is clear. She’s definitely not the only one feeling this way.

In fact, through August of this year, 212,000 more women left the workforce than joined [source: BLS (July/August), National Women’s Law Center]. That’s not a trend. It’s a warning sign that the system is failing women at scale

Many left for exactly the same reasons my client struggled with:

RTO mandates that make commuting and school pick up and drop off impossible (especially for single moms), insensitive meeting start and end times, ‘Always-on’ expectations that steal attention from kids, family, and - well - just plain not working after hours and on weekends.

It’s not that women aren’t trying to navigate with resilience. The atmosphere is unsustainable.

Women in tech are 65% more likely to be laid off than men. Not because we're underperforming. Because the system is designed to push us out.

50% of women leave tech by age 35. Not because we lack ambition. Because we're exhausted from existing in a system that wasn't built for us.

Only 20% of computer science degrees go to women, down from 37% in 1984. We're moving backwards while AI reshapes the future. The data is crystal clear.

But too many talented women in tech still think it’s a personal failing. And we keep being told: Work smarter. Build resilience. Fix your mindset. Lean in.

That talented exec had an epiphany on our call. She now recognizes she’s not broken.

She’s experiencing what happens when our (considerable) superpowers are locked up in a toxic environment. When brilliant people have roles they “should” be successful in, but that deplete them instead of giving them energy.

That's not a personal failing. That's a system mismatch.

Ambition

I used to think something was wrong with me, too.

When I was holding what felt like a heart attack inside my body during every meeting as a senior executive at Salesforce, I thought I needed to get stronger. More resilient.

But it didn’t make sense to me because I have a long history of working well under pressure. It was, to be honest, kind of my brand. 

Something in me shifted, though, as we navigated from COVID to layoff after layoff, managing accelerating reorgs, all the while chasing the coveted AI leadership pole position.

Years of that instability, and rising expectations of the infinite workday, and my body finally called it.

Work that had excited me for my entire life became something I dreaded. The system demanded I sacrifice everything to retain my role, and my success. And I finally said no.

I waited too long to give myself permission. You don’t have to.

In fact, the new ambition is putting ourselves before the job, for the good of our future. So we can leverage our superpowers again because we have the energy.

Here’s your permission slip, dear reader:

Permission to stop fixing yourself. You're not broken. The atmosphere is toxic.

Permission to be strategically angry. Your frustration isn't drama. It's data-supported.

Permission to navigate the system instead of getting crushed by it. Because no one is coming to save us. Disengage enough to retain your sanity. Above and beyond isn’t job security.

But here's the thing about permission: it only works if you take action.

And the first step? Understanding where your real power lives.

GO | DO

Estimated time: 10 - 15 minutes | Estimated energy: minimal

This week, take the Superpower Discovery Challenge

The big picture

You're not broken. The system is. But you can't navigate to your healthy “what’s next” without clarity on what’s happening to your energy in the now.

When I did this exercise before leaving Salesforce, what I thought was my #1 superpower was mentioned exactly zero times. 

But what everyone else saw…my ability to drive change through education and influence…it wasn't even on my list. But every time someone mentioned it, my heart lept with excitement.

That gap? 

🧭 It became my compass for building work that doesn't cost everything.

Quick favor: forward this email to someone who deserves to know it’s not her, it’s the system. Making the workplace a healthier place is going to take all of us.

Get In There

• 🎧 Perfect for your next morning walk! Find your professional superpowers in 4 steps and 27 minutes: A complete framework on The New Ambition podcast

• 🪧 Join the fight for systemic change: Support Moms First, Reshma Saujani’s organization working to fix the systems pushing mothers out of the workforce.

I know the numbers can be overwhelming.

But what I hope you’re taking away this week is this: it’s not you. Work is broken for too many of us. And just by opening this email every week, you’re a part of a resilient group of change-makers building a movement we deserve. It’s going to take all of us to make the workplace a better place.

And we’ll do it together. And if you can’t do it today, know that I did for you. And so did a whole bunch of other people.